Quotes by Scott Adams

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
– Scott Adams
Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.
– Scott Adams
I'm slowly becoming a convert to the principle that you can't motivate people to do things, you can only demotivate them. The primary job of the manager is not to empower but to remove obstacles.
– Scott Adams
If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?
– Scott Adams
If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
– Scott Adams
In Japan, employees occasionally work themselves to death. It's called Karoshi. I don't want that to happen to anybody in my department. The trick is to take a break as soon as you see a bright light and hear dead relatives beckon.
– Scott Adams
In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks.
– Scott Adams
Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.
– Scott Adams
Let's form proactive synergy restructuring teams.
– Scott Adams
Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.
– Scott Adams
The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers.
– Scott Adams
The only risk of failure is promotion.
– Scott Adams
We must develop knowledge optimization initiatives to leverage our key learnings.
– Scott Adams
You don't have to be a person of influence to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.
– Scott Adams
I believe everyody in the world should have guns. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket launchers too. I believe that all citizens should have their weapons of choice. However, I also believe that only I should have the ammunition. Because frankly, I wouldn't trust the rest of the goobers with anything more dangerous than string.
– Scott Adams
Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge.
– Scott Adams
You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
– Scott Adams
You don't argue with a four-year old about why he shouldn't eat candy for dinner. You don't punch a mentally handicapped guy even if he punches you first. And you don't argue when a women tells you she's only making 80 cents to your dollar. It's the path of least resistance. You save your energy for more important battles.
– Scott Adams
Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free.
– Scott Adams
Women are treated differently by society for exactly the same reason that children and the mentally handicapped are treated differently.
– Scott Adams