A good general rule is to state that the bouquet is better than the taste, and vice versa.
– Stephen Potter
If you have nothing to say, or, rather, something extremely stupid and obvious, say it, but in a 'plonking' tone of voice - i.e. roundly, but hollowly and dogmatically.
– Stephen Potter
'Yes, but not in the South', with slight adjustments, will do for any arguments about any place, if not about any person.